trial by gif

the international musical landscape reviewed in zero words or less

Coldplay - Mylo Xyloto

There is no band less capable of arousing human sexual exploit than Coldplay. With Mylo Xyloto, their fifth album too many, they manage to not only elicit fewer erections, but become even more pretentious, via dull variations on the same idea they came up with in 1996.

1. Mylo Xylotio

 

2. Hurts Like Heaven

3. Paradise

4. Charlie Brown
 

5. Us Against the World

 

6. MMIX

 

7. Every Tear is a Waterfall
 

8. Major Minus

9. UFO 

10. Princess of China

11. Up in Flames
 
 

12. A Hopeful Transmission 

13. Don’t Let it Break Your Heart 
 

14. Up with the Birds
 

Mylo Xyloto by Coldplay is not available to stream online, as they want it to be heard as “one cohesive work.” Lol, work.

Tom Waits - Bad As Me

What can you say? It’s genius. More like; good…as…him. … Fuck.

1. Chicago

 

2. Raised Right Men
 

3. Talking at the Same Time
 

4. Get Lost
 

5. Face to the Highway
 

6. Pay Me

7. Back in the Crowd
 

8. Bad As Me
 

9. Kiss Me
 

10. Satisfied
 

11. Last Leaf

 

12. Hell Broke Luce
 

13. New Year’s Eve
 

Bad As Me is out now on Anti Records.

Harvest Festival (Old King’s Oval, Parramatta)

Held out West in Parramatta’s bluegum-speckled Old King’s Oval, the inaugural Harvest Festival was…fuck it, like this:

The Crowd

Bright Eyes / Phosphorescent 

The Booze


Family Stone / TV On the Radio / The Holidays

Mercury Rev

 

 
The Flaming Lips 


Portishead

Harvest continues for one more show at Brisbane’s Riverstage on November 19.

Florence and the Machine - Ceremonials

A lot of words were spoken about Florence & The Machine when they appeared with their radio and Supre-storming debut in 2009. With their latest, ‘Ceremonials,’ peeps still be using the written word when the obvious would do…

1. Only For a Night

2. Shake It Out

 

3. What the Water Gave Me

4. Never Let Me Go

5. Breaking Down

6. Lover to Lover
 

7. No Light, No Light

 

8. Seven Devils

 

9. Heartlines

10. Spectrum

 

11. All This and Heaven Too


Florence and the Machine’s Ceremonials is out now on Universal. 

The Flaming Lips - I Found A Star On the Ground

You know when you’re listening to music after one of those specially fuelled nights and you’re pretty sure THAT bit was put in just to fuck over people in your current state of mind and that possibly all music was made for people on acid but then you start to freak out because that’s obviously not the case and maybe you’re losing your grasp on reality and you know things are gonna be pretty weird for the next few hours and holy shit your pants are moving? The Flaming Lips wrote a six hour song.

Hour 1
 

Hour 2

Hour 3

 

Hour 4

 

Hour 5
 

Hour 6
 

—————————————————————————————

The Ensuing 6 Hours
 

The I Found a Star on the Ground ‘EP’ is streaming on the internet.

Lou Reed & Metallica - Lulu

Lou Reed, tortured genius of the past, collaborates with Metallica, washed up relics of the past. There are no words, only gifs.

1. Brandenburg Gate

 

2. The View
 

3. Pumping Blood


4. Mistress Dread



5. Iced Dead

6. Cheat on Me

7. Frustration

8. Little Dog

9. Dragon
 

10. Junior Dad

Lulu is out now via Warner/Vertigo

The Jezabels - Prisoner

The Jezabels debut album ‘Prisoner’ is fuelling the pubescent angst of 14 year old girls across the nation. The reviews - presumably not written by 14 year old girls - are generally quite positive. But those use words and stuff.

1. Prisoner



2. Endless Summer




3. Long Highway



4. Trycolour


5. Rosebud



6. City Girl


7. Nobody Nowhere


8. Horsehead


9. Austerlitz


10. Deep Wide Ocean


11. Peace of Mind


12. Reprise



13. Catch Me

‘Prisoner’ by the Jezabels is out now through MGM.